been thinking quite alot. got happy de, sad de. reflected much about myself. be it on studies, frenzship, cca, family or watever it is. been kinda disappointing n failure bahz.

i'm alwaes putting up a strong front. i only can keep everything to myself. whenever others asked me, are u okay? i ll alwaes sae yes i'm ok. really hope somedae i can let go of everything. perhaps in the state of breaking down le. i dun even noe wad am i doin. i'm lost.

life is a long journey that you ll nv expect wad's gonna happen the next moment. i can be laughing awae n having a long black face the next second. i cant focus. the best wae out is stop blogging n divert all my attention to studies. i wan to be a cheery xw. not a xw who alwaes is so stern n down. wo hao hen wo zhi zi. wo feng le.

i wan to find the key to open up myself. where's the key?
xiaowei's dead.

time flies. it's holidae again. i ll be busy with all my stuffs like coursework and cca again. i was wib siqi and cs at the library. went out to get stuff. received a sms frm pri bestie. she saw me. but din call out. i asked her why den she sae din wanna disturb me coz me chatting happily wib my fren. she sms "u very bad, dun wan lao peng you le"

sometimes i do really miss em. my olden daes buddies. everyone is alwaes busy with their own lives. different schs. so hard to meet up. i'm realli touched when they smsed or called to ask bout me. recently got sick n qiuhui has been asking me to takecare n if i'm ok.

spending my daes of pri sch at their homes. having steamboats, listening to cds, talking away, playing bball, bbqs. i missed the daes. perhaps coz they're older than me, they taught me alot. on the last dae of last yr [2005], we went ferr countdown, we hugged one another. kinda happy we're still in contact til now. besties stay no matters how long daes and yrs not meeting up or how far we are. i believe only my these besties can realli understand n noe me well enuff. frenship of 4-6yrs.

how many in sec sch are realli true n close frenz? i believed many will start counting or doubting who are realli ur true buddies who stand by you. sharing ur joys n unhappiness. in life, i tink the close ones is the most one or two. if u have alot, reflect back; how many can you share ur secrets n worries with?

#0506 a happy day ;) with grins and smiles. um chio.

parade square canteen my class parade square.

i purposely walked away. HOHOHO~

i'm so.. walking in the freaking big rain after choir. getting more n more sick. =X

but i'm still so happy. wheeeeee. =D
sl3epy needs to rest. nitex!! >".<

afterall mrs yip is not really that bad. she taught me some qns dat i din finish. understand better le. she gt me a cup of water when she noe i'm sick. sae i can go after doin one more sum. told us alot of things. i'm a good student :) i aimin ferr high grades. motivated. buck up!!

well juz back frm doc. dad brought me dere but i alone waited freaking long frm 6.20 to 7plus to see the doc. >< dad gave me $$, waited dere alone. grrr hate it. as usual all old problems la. gt 2 medicines are eat le will dizzy de. how am i gonna stay conscious n awake during lessons? doc told me get mc but i sae dun wan. she kinda shocked. can dun go sch, why not?

freako f&n. 9-4pm on tues-thurs. dun tink i wanna go back on all da daes. holidaes = no holidaes

feeling so restless n weak.

i'm sick. real sick. fever sore throat all coming at one go. i'm exhausted. i gets fed up so easily. noise n gigglings do made me more =/ but no one gonna care.

thanks jasmin n siqi ferr buyin dat sweet. thanks siewming n etc. =) yupx xinee sae shld slp early. i`ll de! after i finish my physics. at times, concern n comforting words does heal a sick person. perhaps to me bahz. got abit hyper during choir wib my crazy gals. dancing n using my sore voice to sing~ yupx my nu er[s] oso sick. takkaire yeah. huplian`hsien juen`geraldine. same same.

rush to buy stuffs opp sch. rained. thanks my dear sb ferr pei-ing me. despite she rushin time, reverse me oso rushing coz.. *secret* shhhh.. went to da bus stop. lyk ytd, smile smile grin grin. yew made my dae. =D i love 157!! ga ga ga~ cure my sickness n madness, anyone. YEW? YEW? YEW?

finally voice out my unhappiness le. u sms-ed me asking why am i so angry. i'm not. i'm juz being fed up and couldn't be bothered with you ppl anymore. empty promises is wad i alwaes get? ''i`ll not do it again?'' watever reasons. c'mon RESPECT. not infering to one. but others too. since u dun bother to respect, do u tink i'll give u face? yup black face. =/ been bearing all these ferr quite some time le. time i shld speak up? had quite enuff le. being unappreciative on dat sundae i went back to sch, pang seng-ing my buddies who celebrating my bdae n got dere to hear u sae ''sure can mahz? i dun wanna u help me'' FINE. might as well i dun go back. more than once u all made me fed up. sickening. patience oso got limits, dun push urselves too far. i hate peepx who open mouth n juz shoot out unpleasant comments. kindly close ur mouth or juz stay away frm me. anyway leaving sch this yr le.

hope u keep ur promise. last time. hopefully.

i dun wished but do i have a choice?

a: notice anything?

b: NO?

c: how can u not?

change the template due to some unseen circumstances. haha. WEEKEND is here !! =) wheeee~ having mixed feelings. moody happy sad fearful all mixed in a blender. oh well.. =/ now is eating the choco MR HO give on my bdae. GUYLIAN choco! nice.

[ fri 03 mar 06]
it's.. todae! if i'm left. i mean right. lol. start off the dae with PE! played captain ball. awww.. mayb shouldn't hab played. fell down while trying to catch a ball. so pain nor. ='C glad it din bleed but feel the intense pain on my leg. dunnoe wad's wrong wib me. will feel giddy easily. losing balance. SIQI PEIHWA we need you! had ss. ms ek was ok, no pms or watever. copy n copy notes. now i cant find my tb.

i hate AMATHS! freaking chim. cant understand rate of change. stop comparing psle scores n saying that we can score better than last yr de 4a 4b. if liddat i in A class le. went physco n moody after triple maths. FREAKING ME OUT. i wanna understand this topic by this wkn. or gonna flung mon's test.

f&n oso another freaking thing. shucks. nah dun elaborate or my naggy long story starts.

i'm totalli sian n fed up. so me & sukhveen shared same instincts. we alto de mahz. somehow i realised when me n veen together we not so stress. OK me n veen will keep to our promise. ^^ haha. i cant lived w/o her. abit sian diao le. so guess whenever nt necessary wun chup anymore. simply tired n too sick! =X

[wed 01 mar 06]
took class photo. LOL. was standin in front of daniel, potato. denn daniel so de lame. he asked me informal siam abit to let camera capture potato ... *details not revealed R21* our class tried to act cute. stupid siqi. took informal n was standin on the bench, she down dere; go stand wib yz. -.- she jealous lahz. haha. took individual grad pic too. they tried to make me laugh but UNSUCCESSFUL. we were bad standing dere laughin at each other.

forgot which dae. we went com lab n go siqi blog n start tagging nonsense. got all da chers tagging. LOL is ms lai tagged when she's having lesson in ava rm. but its us who came up wib de nonsense. haha. had fun. laughed real hard.

realised many things todae. it's been long since i ever sat down n rest. i wanna peace n stress-free daes~ i hate peepx who dun respect me. pls kindly shut ur mouth if unpleasant comments come out. know wad's RESPECT? somemore u're younger. so PLS dun irritate me. my life in a total mess. school cca sleep. is this how i lead my life. my face turned black so often dat i dun even know myself. NO PLAY NO LIFE! i'm tired n sick of dat. holidaes coming. hope i can take a break at least fulfil sleeping for one whole dae? dats all i asked.

i seems to be giving up. i dunnoe.
too tired to think.

enough of unhappy stuffs. CHEER UP yeah! everyday is a BETTER day definitely. =)